World Wrestling Federation – Backlash 2002 – 21st April 2002
This is a pretty historic pay-per-view. The WWF decided that, following the buyouts of WCW and ECW which brought in a significant amount of additional wrestling talent, that there would be a ‘Brand Extension’ – effectively splitting the product into two rival ‘brands’. In kayfabe the Board of Directors did this as a way of resolving the ownership dispute between Ric Flair and Vince McMahon, and in real terms the plan was for the World Wrestling Federation to present two competing, unique and powerful ‘brands’ via their flagship television shows Raw and Smackdown. The Undisputed Champion (Triple H) would be available to both brands, but the rest of the roster was divided via a draft – meaning certain titles became the exclusive properties of each show (RVD, as Intercontinental Champion, made the IC Title exclusive to Raw for instance). This is the first pay-per-view event since the Brand Extension, meaning the first time the Raw and Smackdown brands had been under the same roof for over a month. It’s also the last ppv event under the ‘World Wrestling Federation name’. The main event, courtesy of Smackdown, sees HHH defend the Undisputed Championship against the red and yellow nostalgia train of Hulk Hogan – who had continued to ride the crest of his wave of post-WrestleMania popularity all the way to a title shot. Raw’s main event pits Undertaker against Stone Cold (who’d been talked into returning to the promotion after walking out after Mania). Let’s be honest, neither of those main events sound particularly good – but thankfully the undercard is bursting with vibrant, younger talent looking to make an impression. Kurt Angle and Edge clash as part of their memorable feud. Eddie Guerrero returns to WWF pay-per-view to challenge Rob Van Dam for the IC Title. There’s also Brock Lesnar’s ppv debut, Trish Stratus looking to take her Women’s Title back from Jazz and a rare ppv outing for the Cruiserweight Championship as Billy Kidman defends against Tajiri. Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler are at the booth in Kansas City, MO.
Billy Kidman vs Tajiri – WWF Cruiserweight Title Match
The Cruiserweight Title is Smackdown property and could have been a really cool and unique selling point for the Thursday night brand…if Vince could get over his ‘little guys don’t draw’ mentality. Tajiri had been turned heel by this stage, forcing his girlfriend Torrie Wilson to dress in geisha-esque outfits and into a rather submissive, subservient role. It raised the ire of current Cruiser Champion (and, at this stage, still Torrie’s real-life boyfriend I believe) Billy Kidman.
Kidman gets into a shoving match with Tajiri, but isn’t quite as quick as the Buzzsaw in a back and forth hold exchange so finds himself trapped in the corner and absorbing a couple of strikes. Hurricanrana blocked by the challenger, then countered into a catapult…only for Billy to catch himself on the ropes and hit a missile dropkick for 2! Really cool exchange there, and it doesn’t end as Tajiri WHEELBARROWS Kidman into the guardrail! Lawler is making fun of these guys for being short on commentary by the way…what an absolute ass. Tajiri belts Kidman with a roundhouse kick from the floor, knocking the champion loopy. Tilta-whirl backbreaker scores, softening Billy up enough for the Japanese athlete to nail the tree of woe dropkick. He starts working Kidman’s back, surfboarding it around the ringpost then wrenching him into another backbreaker. He then starts kicking and double stomping it from close range to do still more damage. TARANTULA stretches it out still further but doesn’t finish Billy off sufficiently to allow Tajiri to hit the Buzzsaw Kick. Handspring Elbow countered with a dropkick…so Tajiri puts a spinning heel kick into the back! Bridging German gets 2…and when Billy kicks out Tajiri rolls through again into a BRIDGING PIN for another nearfall! He looks for a powerbomb but Kidman counters in mid-air to a facebuster! SHOOTING STAR PRESS MISSES! More damage done to the midsection and as he clutches at the injury Tajiri lines up the BUZZSAW KICK…FOR 2! AVALANCHE RYDIEN BOMB BY KIDMAN…FOR 2! He looks for a Ligerbomb only to be sprayed with RED MIST! Tajiri is your new Cruiserweight Champion at 09:08
Rating - *** - An exciting, action packed and rewarding way to start the show. Tajiri and Kidman revelled in the opportunity to showcase their skills and prove how popular the Cruiserweight division could be if the WWF got behind it. Tajiri was surprisingly effective as a heel, drawing legitimate heat through his physical mannerisms and his great wrestling (picking apart the back) rather than cheating or using cheap tactics. Presumably these guys went backstage and got slaughtered by the vast squad of Vince’s ‘yes men’ Road Agents, accusing them of ‘doing too much’. That was the problem, the WWF didn’t buy into the concept of cruiserweight wrestlers being a draw. So when they started getting over by being able to do things that the creaking veterans at the top of the card (HHH, Austin, Undertaker, Hogan etc) couldn’t do in exciting, spot-filled matches like this they had to be quickly silenced lest they expose the old timers for their lack of skill and ability and dent their drawing power too.
Bradshaw and Faarooq meet up backstage, having been split up as part of the Brand Extension.
Scott Hall vs Bradshaw
So the nWo kicked Hulk Hogan out for embracing The Rock and the fans at WrestleMania, and replaced him with X-Pac. It made some sense to the ‘smart fans’ who were aware of the existing friendship between Hall, Nash and Waltman…but it’s still a massive kayfabe step down. After somewhat tanking in his match with Austin at WrestleMania, Hall was selected as the guy WWF would use to try and get Bradshaw over as a singles babyface (like that would ever be something serious wrestling fans would want).
X-Pac is in Hall’s corner, wearing Kane’s mask as a trophy. Faarooq comes out to make sure Pac doesn’t play a factor in the match. Hall does his toothpick gimmick with Bradshaw, who comically ignores it and full on whacks the nWo man in the face. Hall bumps like a sack of sh*t on a DDT spot, then leaves the ring to get clobbered by Faarooq for good measure. For some reason that’s not a DQ even though the referee saw the whole thing. Hall has to break a few rules himself to counteract the hard-hitting, no-thrills approach of his opponent. ‘Hall doesn’t make many mistakes’ – JR, presumably with his tongue firmly in his cheek. Bradshaw mows Hall down with the Clothesline From Hell, but it only gets 2 after X-Pac puts Scott’s foot on the bottom rope. Faarooq shoves Pac into the ringpost, but in the ring Hall rolls Bradshaw up using the tights to win at 05:44
Rating - DUD - The WWF didn’t understand or use the New World Order effectively. That much is a given. But they certainly weren’t aided by the fact that Hall was massively washed up and next to useless in the ring by this point. Into his forties, with a body feeling the effects of years of abuse (in every sense of the word), he was slow, uncoordinated and a shadow of the talent he was in the mid-90’s. He definitely wasn’t the workhorse to get a good match out of a lumbering oaf like Bradshaw. This was unbelievably poor.
Smackdown owner Vince McMahon saunters into Ric Flair’s office. He thinks Flair is starting to think like him now he’s burdened by the complexities of ownership and wants to know what the thinking is behind appointing himself as referee in the Undertaker/Austin match tonight…
Jazz vs Trish Stratus – WWF Women’s Title Match
The Women’s Title is exclusive property of Raw, which presumably makes it sh*tty work if you’re a diva drafted to the Smackdown brand. Trish defeated Molly Holly (who had ditched the Mighty Molly garb now, and was lumbered with the rather cruel and narrow-minded ‘virgin’ gimmick which she has absolutely savaged in every interview she’s ever given since her departure) to get here, and will be desperate to finally get her Women’s Title back from the dominant Jazz.
Molly Holly comes out to call Trish a cheating skank then slams her into the ring steps – before Jazz has even entered the arena. The champion immediately attacks Trish’s back, but has to deal with some plucky retaliation from the injured challenger who comes at her with a nifty little kick sequence. HANDSPRING frankensteiner scores for Stratus, followed by a neckbreaker for 2. LIGERBOMB puts her straight back onto her spine. Naturally, despite a physically impressive and imposing performance, JR and Lawler are discussing how ugly Jazz is. Stratusfaction COUNTERED to a spinning back suplex! And with her back screaming in pain Jazz picks apart Trish’s legs too – dragon screwing her into a Boston crab. STF makes Trish tap at 04:28
Rating - ** - I actually could have done with this going on for longer. Trish was really starting to get into her groove as a wrestler now – and her bumping and selling for Jazz in this was really first rate. Jazz was something of a misunderstood gem of a performer during her time in the company. She was really fun to watch as a mauling, physically oppressive force in the women’s division – but the WWF and, in particularly, their commentators, never really understood that. She was always presented as this ugly, hard-hitting scrub and unsurprisingly, never got over as much as she should have. This was a really fun little title match.
LAST WEEK – Lita caught Paul Heyman sniffing her underwear and propositioning her – with the threat that he’d have Brock Lesnar destroy Matt Hardy. She turned him down, so Paul E. had Lesnar destroy Matt on Raw with an F-5 on the stage. Jeff replaces Matt to face the Next Big Thing tonight…
In their locker room, Lesnar is hyped up by his agent – ahead of his first official WWF match.
Jeff Hardy vs Brock Lesnar
We’ve just seen highlights of how this one came about. Paul Heyman returned to WWF television as the agent of ‘the Next Big Thing’ Brock Lesnar – and over the next few weeks Brock made an impression by destroying as many jobbers as he could find. Having laid waste to Matt Hardy on Raw, Jeff replaces his brother to face Brock in his first official match…
Realising he is rather hopelessly outmatched, Jeff tries to attack Brock during his entrance…which doesn’t work and he is unceremoniously tossed out of the ring. Next he tries a pescado only to be caught…but somehow he manages to shunt his huge opponent into the ringpost. Lesnar isn’t remotely impressed and manhandles Hardy into the corner before dragging him out with a belly to belly suplex. Hardy struggles to breathe so the predatory Next Big Thing picks him up for ROLLING ribbreakers. A desperate Whisper In The Wind scores to the delight of the Kansas City crowd, and Jeff hits a jawbreaker to get Brock off his feet. Swanton Bomb nailed…but Lesnar emphatically kicks out! F-5 NAILED! The match is over, but under Heyman’s instruction Brock doesn’t pin Hardy and instead repeatedly powerbombs him until the ref stops it. Lesnar wins at 05:31
Rating - ** - An effective way to debut Lesnar on pay-per-vew. In fact, the use of the Hardyz to get Brock over in general was quite an effective way to debut him. He certainly was an amazing physical specimen, and Heyman’s unique performance as his agent definitely created a mystique around him – however, at this stage people hadn’t really taken to him yet. For all the talk of NCAA Championships, amazing amateur credentials and so forth, and this stage he was just another flavour-of-the-week monster Vince wanted to push so fans were understandably cautious.
Kurt Angle vs Edge
This was an early example of the benefits the Brand Extension could provide. At WrestleMania both of these guys were stuck in unfulfilling and completely forgettable undercard feuds which amounted to a massive waste of their talents. Angle has been WWF Champion before, and is acknowledged as one of the best workers on the roster – but with so many main eventers floating around now there was scepticism as to whether he was actually a main event level draw in 2002. As such they put him in the ring with Edge, who WAS viewed as a potential draw in the future and therefore needed grooming. They were former friends, they began feuding again after Edge scored an unlikely victory over Kurt on television and this was correctly presented as Edge looking to advance his career by proving himself better than one of the best wrestlers on the entire roster. Sensible booking, sensible feud – now it’s time to pay it off with a credible in-ring performance.
Despite not being a ‘draw’, Kurt is comfortably the most over heel on the show so far. He doesn’t enjoy a great start to the match though, finding himself overwhelmed by Edge who is tenacious from the outset. A flapjack drops Angle on his face, causing him to flee the ring. After two minutes of control by the Canadian Kurt has seen enough…and drops Edge on his neck with a German suplex. A belly to belly moments later cements his advantage as his wrestling prowess starts to overcome the fire and determination of his opponent. Edge is whisked to the canvas where Angle totally controls him and, as soon as he fights his way back up he is blasted with more German suplexes! BELLY TO BELLY BY EDGE! A move out of the ‘Angle playbook’ helps bring Edge back into the match, and he looks to work at a visibly quicker pace to make the most of it. EDGECUTION gets 2! His usual finish didn’t get the job done there, but he remains focused and drops Angle again with the Faceplant. ROPE RUN BELLY TO BELLY SUPERPLEX nailed by Angle! Anklelock blocked…so it’s ROLLING GERMANS instead! Angle Slam blocked though…into a HEAD DROP GERMAN by Edge! He tosses Kurt over the top rope – then piles out after him with a SUICIDE DIVE! Edgecution blocked…then the Edge-O-Matic is COUNTERED TO THE ANGLE SLAM FOR 2! ANKLELOCK! And the place goes nuts when Edge counters it into a roll-up and nearly snatches victory too. Angle starts to wonder what it will take to put Edge away and loses his temper so goes for a steel chair. He swings it his opponent, who ducks causing it to ricochet off the ropes into Kurt’s face! EDGE-O-MATIC for 2! Spear COUNTERED with a kick the face, then the ANGLE SLAM! Kurt wins at 13:24
Rating - **** - It’s not that people weren’t expecting this to be a decent match, but I think most were absolutely blown away by how exciting this one was. Angle was so good at this point, and he worked like crazy to give Edge a star-making performance. He played the veteran role well, selling Edge’s fiery up-and-comer offence like death, dominating the heat segment with precision and skill, then putting Edge over hard down the stretch. Edge’s performance against an established main event talent like Kurt did wonders for his career too. He’d looked good in the IC Title division, and improved his wrestling skills noticeably by getting to work William Regal for a few months. But even considering that, it’s amazing that he was almost unrecognisable from the worker he was when he and Christian first split up and ran through some inexperienced and somewhat disappointing ppv matches last autumn. It was a match and feud designed to make him look like a player – and it absolutely delivered. The show has been stolen…
Tazz is at WWF New York, showing his broadcast journalist skills as he polls fans on who will win the Undisputed Championship Match.
Chris Jericho isn’t booked tonight, but crashes the show and makes his way into the arena anyway. He is furious at not having a match tonight (‘even Maven has a match’ – Jericho). He goes on to complain at Hogan getting a title shot instead of him, then leaves.
In his locker room Flair is getting prepared for his officiating duties, only to be interrupted by Undertaker (who looks SO slim) looking to intimidate him again.
Rob Van Dam vs Eddie Guerrero – WWF Intercontinental Title Match
Getting released from the WWF last year was a low point in Eddie’s illustrious career. He went away, got himself clean, and went back to busting his ass and paying his dues on the independent scene. Fans of promotions like Ring Of Honor and IWA Mid-South all got to enjoy as he tried to rebuild his career – and it didn’t go unnoticed in Connecticut. He returned to the WWF after a year-long absence, was drafted to Raw and immediately pursued RVD for his newly won Intercontinental Title. Van Dam is a talented guy but he’ll know he has his work cut out for him against the resourceful, resilient and massively motivated Latino Heat tonight.
In one of the highlights of the show, King asks JR who he first saw do a frog splash in the WWF – and he answers ‘probably D’Lo Brown’. YES! He’s down with the Brown and shat all over dumb ass Jerry’s point too! Guerrero looks to get the jump on Van Dam but is put on his back with a couple of spinning heel kicks. Like a true pro Eddie changes tactics in an instant and goes straight after RVD’s legs to stop him kicking. Sadly it doesn’t prove effective and the champ is soon kicking him again, knocking him down into a standing moonsault for 2. It’s too early for the Five Star though, and he gets crotched on the turnbuckles as punishment. Superplex COUNTERED with a flying top rope guillotine by Van Dam, who then shoots back in with a springboard heel kick. Handspring moonsault gets another nearfall as Guerrero struggles to deal with Rob’s innovative offence. MOONSAULT PRESS OFF THE APRON! And it’s followed with the corkscrew leg drop to the floor too! Eddie finally makes some headway in the match by blocking Rolling Thunder with his knees. It apparently hurts Rob’s back so he quickly follows it up with a backbreaker then a back suplex. The challenger stays on the back, busting out multiple submission stretches to stretch and distort that body part. ROPE RUN RANA whips him down onto it again for a nearfall, followed by a brainbuster/back drop driver combo. Guerrero things it’s Frog Splash time now, only to be caught with a bicycle kick in the corner. SUNSET FLIP BOMB GETS 2! He nearly broke Van Dam in half on that! Despite that he steps into a rolling heel kick. Tim White is accidentally bumped, allowing Guerrero to hit a NECKBREAKER ON THE TITLE BELT! FROG SPLASH! Eddie wins at 11:42
Rating - *** - I seem to remember that, at the time, people had really high hopes for this match and were actually a little disappointed. With the benefit of hindsight though, one can truly appreciate what an effective little contest this was. RVD was dominant at first, as Guerrero (perhaps still struggling to reacclimatise to the WWF) looked completely flummoxed by is unorthodox style. Finally he found a strategy that worked when he started attacking the back and neck of his opponent – and that theme went all the way through to the finish when he hit a neckbreaker on the title then Frog Splashed his way back to the IC Championship. Rob seriously put Eddie over here, which Guerrero needed following his hiatus from the company. Their feud continued and they had a couple of significantly better matches in the coming months anyway. Given the tragic, early end to Eddie’s career, it’s also quite an emotional sight getting to see him win his big ppv comeback match. It was not over victory over Van Dam he was celebrating, but victory over his personal demons that nearly cost him his career
SIDENOTE – You can stop the DVD now if you’d like. It’s actually been a pretty decent show up to this point. Spoiler alert: the rest sucks a dick.
Undertaker vs Steve Austin
So Stone Cold walked out on the WWF the night after WrestleMania. Multiple reasons surfaced for his absence, from exhaustion to frustration at how bad his feud and match with Scott Hall were, to annoyance at HHH’s backstage power, disappointment at not being in the WWF Championship picture, to general disillusionment with the WWF’s current creative direction. He was talked into coming back, and made the centrepiece of a Brand Extension skit as both Vince and Flair competed for his signature. He eventually signed with the Raw brand and leapt into a feud with Undertaker over who’d get to be #1 contender to the WWF Title after Backlash. Flair, still licking the wounds inflicted by Taker at WrestleMania and with his pride hurting after Stone Cold had given him a few Stunners has inserted himself into this one as guest referee.
First knockdown goes to the svelte Undertaker, with such force that Austin has to leave the ring to recover. It takes Stone Cold the best part of two minutes to hit back – eventually clocking Taker with a clubbing right hand. By five minutes in it’s obvious these two are going long. Physical contact has been minimal, both man has only bumped once and we get a good thirty seconds of posturing each time before they even touch each other. Stone Cold breaks out the junior heavyweight offence with armdrags and drop toeholds which finally get Big Evil off his feet for a sustained period of time. Undertaker knows he can’t work at such a fast pace, so socks Austin with some punches and a clothesline to slow it right back down. Old School rope walk ends with a firm strike to the back of Steve’s problematic neck – drawing a vicious defensive reaction from the Rattlesnake who leaps into the Thesz Press to make sure the Phenom doesn’t attack his neck again. A big boot knocks Austin off the apron as the clock ticks towards ten minutes, starting a brawl which spills all the way around ringside. Staying out there doesn’t turn out to be the wisest move by Austin – who gets back dropped on the floor before taking another elbow drop to his neck. Scott Hall and X-Pac are watching the match from the stage, with Pac getting more heat than the rest of this whole match thus far. Taker leg drops Austin’s neck over the apron and having successfully injured that surgically-repaired body part he then goes to work attacking Steve’s permanently-crappy knees too. The pace in this has been so brutally slow some fans have clearly decided they can have a better match themselves – and immediately get three quarters of the fans in the building watching them instead.
Austin and Taker are still on the canvas doing as little as possible. Austin tries to negate the Deadman’s strength with a sleeper hold but is dropped on his neck again with a back suplex…before we go back to rest holds. Hall and Waltman are practically comatose in the aisle watching too. The pace momentarily quickens as Austin tries to flee the vice-like clutches of his larger opponent, only to be hammered in the neck again; this time by Taker’s rolling lariat. Undertaker exposes one of the turnbuckle bolts, but gets knocked into it himself…and the two men collide mid-ring with a double clothesline spot so they can LIE AROUND SOME MORE! Tombstone Piledriver blocked, but Flair is bumped in the process, and as Austin lands a Stone Cold Stunner there’s nobody in play to count the pin. Taker whacks Steve in the balls then clamps a hand around his damaged neck to hit a Chokeslam for 2. Flair’s ability to count pinfalls is pretty minimal by the way. He does a better job at taking a steel chair from Undertaker, turning his back for Austin to low blow Taker. BUT UNDERTAKER DOESN’T SELL LOW BLOWS! EVER! Literally within five seconds he’s back booting Austin in the face again. Stunner blocked, knocking poor Ric Flair down again and allowing Undertaker to floor his opponent with a chair shot. Taker wants to show he’s a shooter yo, and tries a dragon sleeper only to get clotheslined to the ground. Austin tries to use the steel chair to his advantage…but gets it kicked back into his own face. Flair LOOKS AT AUSTIN’S FOOT TO MAKE SURE IT’S ON THE ROPES…then counts to three. It’s finally over at 26:59
Rating - * - Holy hell was this ever a chore to sit through. On the one hand it’s hard to begrudge Austin wanting to work slower, safer matches given how bad his physical state was at this point…but at the same time, if they want to protect him, they shouldn’t be sending him out to work 30-minute main event level matches. This was a borderline disastrous match, as the two veterans tried to show they could still ‘rassle’, but actually bored the pants off of everyone as they worked at the slowest pace imaginable. It wasn’t all bad (I liked Undertaker’s assault on Austin’s neck), but they had enough material here for maybe ten minutes of match…and somehow stretched it out to almost half an hour. Flair was appalling in his role as referee, with some abysmal counting and a total botch on the finish where you saw him look straight at Austin’s foot to make sure it was on the ropes before he started counting. Hall and X-Pac contributed absolutely nothing by standing in the aisle looking bored to tears too. These two are deservedly acknowledged as two of WWF’s greatest ever stars. Undertaker would still be having classic matches over a decade later, so it’s not like they COULDN’T work good matches. But this was a self-indulgent, overly-long, interminably dull snorefest that the creative team were absolute idiots to sanction. And the worst part is, I bet it’s crap matches like this which meant guys in the cruiserweight division were getting heat for doing too many MOVEZZZZZZ.
Flair bails quickly, which actually makes sense considering Undertaker has been bullying him for months. Austin gets a measure of revenge with a Stunner in the ring…and as Flair gets back through the curtain Jonathan Coachman is on hand to show him a video replay of the finish. ‘Oh sh*t’ – Flair.
Billy & Chuck vs Al Snow/Maven – WWF Tag Title Match
Because the live audience need a chance to simmer down after the non-stop excitement of the Undertaker vs Austin match. Billy & Chuck survived the threat of three top tier teams at WrestleMania, and are in a strong position as Tag Champions now with both the Dudleyz and the APA separated by the roster split. They’ve also added Rico to their act as their stylist. Snow was Maven’s trainer in Tough Enough, and as I presume Tough Enough 2 was airing or about to air, they started teaming to get publicity for the show.
He might have been a pretty limited performer, but Maven’s entrance music was easily one of the best themes around at this stage. The champions sensibly isolate him right away, tossing his body into the guardrails and stomping him into the ground. He manages to land a DDT on Gunn but barely makes it halfway across the ring before being dragged back into the champions’ corner for more punishment. Snow gets a tag, but similarly struggles to compete with the fluency and cohesion of Billy & Chuck. Rico is standing on the outside doing very little, but is already getting more heat than the entire Austin/Undertaker match. Palumbo hits a nice belly to belly on Al…only to take a drop toehold straight into Billy’s crotch. Hot tag to Maven…who lowers his head like a rookie and eats a Fame Asser. Rico inadvertently heel kicks Chuck, as Al lands the Snow Bomb on Gunn. Unfortunately Snow starts chasing Rico and doesn’t see his protégé eat a superkick from Chuck. The champs retain at 05:58
Rating - DUD - Too long to be a good squash, and too one-sided to be considered a decent match by normal standards either. They got caught between the two and accomplished neither. If you’re looking for positives then you could say that Billy & Chuck were starting to get some genuine chemistry as a team, and Maven was starting to show some actual improvement as an in-ring performer despite still being horribly green.
Triple H vs Hulk Hogan – WWF Undisputed Title Match
In the aftermath of WrestleMania, Hogan enjoyed such a tidal wave of fan support that Vince simply couldn’t ignore it. He went back to wearing red and yellow, and was announced as #1 contender to the Undisputed Championship. HHH quickly called it a gimmicky nostalgia trip, it was what the fans wanted to see (apparently). Helmsley went through hell with his rehab, his divorce and his battle to become WWF Champion once again at WrestleMania 18, so will be desperate not to drop the belt at the very next pay-per-view. Hogan won back the affection of the fans at WrestleMania, but now wants to complete the most unlikely comeback story of all time by climbing to the top of the mountain again. Unfortunately the home video cuts out Jimi Hendrix’s ‘Voodoo Child’ as his entrance music, which was pretty much the coolest part of this ridiculous babyface nostalgia run in 2002.
The crowd are firmly behind Hogan, agitating Triple H who starts shoving him and demanding his full attention. The opening minutes are SO slow it makes Undertaker/Austin seem like Guerrero/Mysterio from Halloween Havoc ’97. They run through pretty much every clichéd stall for time spot you can imagine – so we have lock-ups, wristlocks, tests of strength, headlocks, shoulder blocks…and of course plenty of posing. Five minutes in and Hogan still hasn’t bumped (or lost his bandana), and Hunter has seen enough. He slaps Hollywood in the face, tears his bandana off then peppers him with punches in the corner. The challenger makes a comeback, breaking out the Axe Bomber before mounting the Game in the corner for a succession of punches. Helmsley hits his facebuster…and STILL Hogan hasn’t bumped! He stands there after taking that, before back dropping Triple H to the floor. Hunter thinks about a suplex on the floor (dream on)…only for it to be countered into a suplex by the Hulkster instead – though it visibly knocks the wind out of the elderly challenger’s sails simply executing that. He’s still recovering as they get back into the ring and very nearly falls victim to the Pedigree. HHH attacks the knee, driving it into the apron and the ringpost. One more chop block to the knee and HOGAN BUMPS! HOGAN BUMPS! Twelve minutes in and we have his first legitimate back bump of the match! He may have overwhelming crowd support, but HHH has been winning title matches for years in the WWF by devising strategies to destroy his opponents. His ‘Cerebral Assassin’ moniker is very much coming to the fore now as he picks apart the bum knee. ‘Hulkamania is a feeling…an emotion’ – JR, although he could easily be describing how you feel after passing a particularly large crap. Figure 4 Leglock applied (and HHH embraces the jeers of the crowd by grabbing the ropes for extra leverage) to leave the challenger screaming in pain. When Hulk makes the ropes business really picks up…as we have a sleeper hold. That’s right, they’ve been working SO hard so far that they need a spot where they can LIE AROUND DOING NOTHING for a couple of minutes. The fact that this match is still going is mind-blowingly moronic…and amazingly Hulk starts a comeback with a back suplex. Big Boot/Leg Drop combo nailed, but before he can complete the victory Chris Jericho runs in and drags Earl Hebner out of the ring. He belts Hogan with a chair too…but HHH doesn’t want to win like that so he attacks Y2J. When the Game turns back to his opponent he finds him Hulking up, only to MISS the Leg Drop. PEDIGREE NAILED! Undertaker runs in now, punching Hebner in the face just when it looked all over. Undertaker clearly wants Hogan at Judgment Day so levels Helmsley with a chair. Hulk knocks Taker out of the ring…then Leg Drops to victory at 22:04
Rating - DUD - This was so embarrassingly bad that it actually ended up having some merit as a comedy match. HHH has attracted a lot of haters over the years, but it’s impossible not to feel sorry for him as you watch his long-awaited babyface title run jettisoned in favour of a flash in the pan nostalgia run for Hogan. And the worst part is that Hulk was so old and carrying so many injuries (some stemming from, and some even pre-dating WrestleMania 18) that he couldn’t even wrestle a match. It was pretty much like watching Hunter wrestle himself for twenty minutes. Hulk was gassed early and needed legitimate MINUTES to recover any time he dared to take a simple bump. I can understand why the decision was made to put the belt on Hulk. He was getting monster pops, and HHH was tanking as a babyface. But who on earth booked these guys into a 20+ minute match? Even at Mania, where Hogan was slightly less beaten up, had been on the road for less time, they had a much better crowd and a much more mobile opponent in The Rock, Hulk was only booked to work for sixteen minutes. In 2002 this was as boring as wrestling gets. The Attitude Era had happened, and fans simply didn’t buy into lengthy headlocks, or tests of strength, or wristlocks. And, in many ways, that was the problem with putting the belt on Hogan. Nostalgia and a dream match at WrestleMania is one thing. Asking a guy who couldn’t wrestle over a decade earlier when he was in his prime to then carry the company at almost 50-years old was always going to end in disaster. Unless you get your kicks from ‘so bad it’s good’ wrestling this will make you feel empty inside.
HHH has bladed to sell that chair shot (probably to protect his own credibility rather than to put this shower of sh*t match over), but shakes Hogan’s hand before staring down the aisle at Undertaker.
Tape Rating - ** - After working so hard to kill WCW, the World Wrestling Federation basically put on a WCW pay-per-view here. The old codgers bored everyone to tears in overbooked, overly long and horribly wrestled main events whilst the young guys on the undercard busted their asses and killed themselves in a desperate attempt to get over, get noticed and give the fans something to cheer about. Ironically, the first half of the show was one of the best ppv undercards of the year (ignoring the terrible Hall/Bradshaw match of course). You had Brock Lesnar making his ppv bow, Eddie Guerrero completing his comeback with an IC Title win, the cruiserweights KILLING IT in the opener and a spectacular, show-stealing bout between Edge and Kurt Angle. But then we got to the second half where egos were stroked, old timers who couldn’t hack it in the ring anymore got all the spotlight and faux reality TV shows were promoted in Tag Title matches. Undertaker/Austin and HHH/Hogan were two of the most laughably atrocious main events you will ever see. If you want to know why the WWF creatively and financially nosedived through most of 2002 you need look no further than this show.
Top 3 Matches
3) Rob Van Dam vs Eddie Guerrero (***)
2) Billy Kidman vs Tajiri (***)
1) Kurt Angle vs Edge (****)