World Wrestling Entertainment – WrestleMania 20 – 14th March 2004
After two inconsistent but ultimately pretty satisfying pay-per-view events to start 2004 we arrive at the twentieth annual WrestleMania. Back in Madison Square Garden (as the promotion were for the first and tenth editions), and with a surprisingly solid line-up, anticipation was high for this. What is particularly refreshing about this card is the amount of new blood it places in astoundingly prominent positions. John Cena was a red hot rising star by this point and challenges for the first singles title of his career as he faces Big Show for the US Title. Eddie Guerrero, fresh off his career-defining WWE Title victory at No Way Out now defends that belt in a purists’ dream match with Kurt Angle. Former friends Chris Jericho and Christian settle their squabble in a marquee midcard encounter. Randy Orton’s feud with Mick Foley continues as he teams with Evolution stable-mates Batista and Ric Flair to take on the Rock’n’Sock Connection. The main event has Chris Benoit finally trying to burst through the glass ceiling to claim a World Title (in WWE), although he has WWE mainstays with plentiful championship experience in front of him since his opponents are Triple H and Shawn Michaels. The rest of the card features the return of the Undertaker, the exits of Brock Lesnar and Goldberg, and of course far too many matches with far too many participants to jam as many workers onto the card as possible. JR, Jerry Lawler, Tazz and Michael Cole are in Manhattan, NY
The Harlem Boys Choir open the event with a beautiful version of ‘America, The Beautiful’. Obviously I’m not American so I don’t have too much right to comment, but personally I found their touching, stripped back and sincere performance far more powerful than the usual pop diva warbling her way through key changes and showy vocal licks.
Big Show vs John Cena – WWE United States Title Match
The rivalry between these two stretches back months. As far back as Survivor Series we saw John Cena hiting an F-U on the massive Big Show and eliminating him from the Smackdown 5-on-5 match. Last month they did battle over #1 contendership to the WWE Title, and although both fell short there once again it was Cena making a big impression by hanging with both Show and Olympic Gold Medallist Kurt Angle. Now he has the chance to kick off WrestleMania by claiming his first ever singles title. It’s fair to say the NY crowd are pumped for him too.
The camera zooms on Cena’s ‘Word Life’ knucks so you can see how much he is shaking and trembling ahead of his WrestleMania debut. Show ensures it’s not a successful start for him as he shakes off all his offence and dismissively tosses him from the ring. Crossbody attempted by Cena next only for him to be caught and emphatically powerslammed. There is nothing coming back at the champ – as he essentially lumbers around the ring after Cena beating the sh*t out of him. It’s effective though and the crowd are biting on every glimmer of a Cena comeback. Big Show’s version of Matt Sydal’s Slice gets 2. Cobra Clutch applied as a tribute to recent Hall Of Famer Sgt. Slaughter, which John escapes by dropkicking the knees. F-U NAILED! FOR 2! Cena can’t believe that’s not the finish, so sneakily grabs his knucks. He waffles Show with the weapon, then wins with another F-U at 09:12
Rating - ** - Probably a little long and a little too reliant on Big Show’s limited offence, but on the whole this was a seriously effective opener. At this point John Cena was everything he ISN’T now. He was fresh, different and still just about edgy enough as a babyface so as to be cool. His gradual babyface turn felt very organic and that was wonderfully concluded here with his first singles title win in his WrestleMania debut. Although his run with the US Title amounted to basically nothing, Big Show’s title reign was actually surprisingly effective. You may not remember anything about what happened in between, but the fact that it started by taking the belt of Eddie so he could go into the Los Guerreros split angle then main event slot…and ends by delivering a memorable and significant moment in John Cena’s career, mean he was an extremely effective placeholder champion.
The Coach, Eric Bischoff and Johnny Nitro conduct a meeting. Bischoff wants Coach to find the Undertaker and recruit him for Raw. Coach’s chickensh*t reaction is the crux of the comedy…
Randy Orton conducts an interview from the very same staircase that he kicked Mick Foley down last June (I think that was the very start of his ‘Legend Killer’ gimmick). His promos don’t pop and burn with venom like they would in years to come but he effectively sets the scene for his match tonight without the need for any histrionics from Ric Flair – who stands alongside him (with Batista) completely silent.
Booker T/Rob Van Dam vs La Resistance vs Mark Jindrak/Garrison Cade vs Dudley Boyz – World Tag Title Match
Both Raw and Smackdown’s Tag Titles are defended in fourway matches tonight, both of which with equally little steam behind them. Booker and RVD are the defending champions here and to be completely frank with you I honestly can’t remember why they were teaming. I can tell you that it was because they were both popular with the fans and had nothing else to do…but one presumes that’s reality rather than their actual storyline. La Res are the Dupree/Conway version. The Dudleyz are seriously over in New York but as stale as it gets creatively…which just leaves the new duo of Mark Jindrak (a WCW Power Plant graduate who was originally supposed to get Batista’s spot in Evolution) and Garrison Cade (a Shawn Michaels Wrestling Academy graduate who the likes of Danielson and Spanky always insist was extremely good…despite always appearing to be totally boring and forgettable during his multiple runs on the main roster).
WWE care so little about the Raw Tag Titles that they still haven’t updated the graphic to match the new belts (which were introduced AGES ago). The champs take turns roughing up both members of La Resistance – who are so unpopular the Dudleyz throw cheap shots at them from the apron just because. It’s already clear that the Dudleyz and the Booker/RVD team are going to carry the bulk of the work to cover for the complete lack of experience on the other two teams. To be fair, during their brief periods in the ring Cade and Jindrak look significantly more serviceable than the Basham Brothers, or La Resistance when they debuted. Conway applies a surfboard…and is apparently SO unconvincing in doing so that nobody else in the match feels any need to break it lest Booker T should submit. After the ridiculously racial angle with HHH last year and the ‘shampoo feud’ with Edge the year before, Booker is probably just pleased to not be totally embarrassed by his WrestleMania storyline. D-Von shoves RVD off the top rope as he lines up the Frog Splash…and JR amusingly queries whether that should count as a tag or not. Cade saves Booker from the 3-D for ABSOLUTELY NO REASON! Why? He could have just broken the pin! Ghetto Blaster on Conway, followed by the Five Star Frog Splash. The champs retain at 07:51
Rating - * - Obviously the eight talents involved would have been sad, but the truth is this match wouldn’t have been missed if it was cut to the pre-show (or altogether). I don’t see the point of booking La Res or Jindrak/Cade in the match if you basically don’t trust them to do anything…although Cade’s idiotic breaking of the 3-D at the end for no reason whatsoever maybe makes that a logical decision. If they were desperate to get the World Tag Titles on the card a straight Booker/RVD vs Dudleyz match would have been a much better bet.
Coach is prowling through the bowels of MSG on the hunt for the Undertaker. All he finds is Gene Okerlund, Bobby Heenan, Mae Young and Fabulous Moolah having an orgy in a cupboard. Seriously...
Christian vs Chris Jericho
These two were friends and former tag partners, until they let women get in the way of their friendship. Initially a juvenile bet was placed between them as they raced to nail Trish Stratus and Lita…but Y2J found himself falling for Trish. When the truth about ‘the bet’ came out, Trish was understandably furious. Christian, not too fussed about the whole thing, led he and Jericho into an intergender battle against Lita and Trish on ppv last year – even though Jericho was visibly upset about having to wrestle Trish. He tried to apologise and make amends to Trish, eventually finding himself in the ‘friend zone’ and also completely unaware that Christian (who had urged him to get over the whole thing) was trying to worm HIS way in on Trish too. After Christian decided to attack Trish during another Bischoff-booked intergender encounter, and pick a backstage fight with Jericho himself, their friendship and team spectacularly fell apart – culminating in this encounter. Will Jericho get revenge and successfully defend Trish’s honour, or will Christian prove that Y2J should have stayed focused on in-ring matters by delivering a decisive victory?
Jericho starts by PUNCHING CHRISTIAN IN THE FACE! I mean balling up his fist and belting his opponent right in the jaw! It even sounded disgusting and starts a theme of Jericho being crazily aggressive which continues through the opening minutes. He back drops him over the ropes then follows him with a SPRINGBOARD SUICIDE DIVE TO THE FLOOR! Walls Of Jericho blocked by a frantic Christian…who finally gets his match started by poking Chris in the eyes then BACK SUPLEXING HIM TO THE FLOOR! A front row fan holds up a sign which reads ‘Paul London = Ratings’. I love that guy! Christian’s offence consists almost entirely of being a cheat – either through raking the face, pulling the hair or chokes in the ropes – and I don’t mean that critically at all. He even uses an eye rake to break the Walls Of Jericho. Disrespectful kicks and slaps come next as Y2J has been rendered semi-blind and totally unable to defend himself. It’s almost dumb luck that sees their heads collide, temporarily halting Christian’s advances and buying Jericho some time to recover. Christian grabs the ropes on a pinfall and comes perilously close to snatching the win, but then has his reverse DDT countered with a northern lights suplex. Lionsault BLOCKED with knees only for Jericho to evade the Unprettier. TORNADO REVERSE DDT gets 2 for Christian! RUNNING sleeper slam by Jericho! This match is awesome! Y2J has taken such a beating he’s slow to capitalise and winds up getting the inverted DDT backbreaker. CHRISTIAN CLOVERLEAF on Jericho! He had knee issues at this point which had been further exacerbated by the match itself so this is a seriously credible false finish. COUNTERED TO THE WALLS OF JERICHO! Christian grabs the ropes and crawls out of the ring but even then Jericho won’t break the hold. Double underhook superplex scores for Jericho…but his leg is so injured he can’t follow up. Trish Stratus makes her inevitable appearance at this point, watching from ringside as Christian scoops Jericho up for the EDGE-CUTION! FOR 2! Totally frustrated, Christian drags Trish into the ring by her hair and tosses her around…and as Jericho comes to rescue her she ‘accidentally’ elbows him right in the face. Chris is so shocked by that he stumbles backwards into a handful-of-tights roll-up giving Christian the win at 14:42
Rating - **** - The feud may have been pure soap opera, and the Trish heel turn didn’t make a whole lot of sense (she didn’t like Jericho making a bet…so she left him for the other guy making the bet, who also liked to beat her up just for kicks?)…but these two were ON tonight. Christian gave an epic heel performance, pulling out quite literally every villainous trick you could think of. From basics like hair pulling and eye gouging, through to more advanced heel-ocity like attacking a pre-existing injury and even stealing the finishing move of his own former tag partner (Edge). What I love about this match, and the feud in general, is that Jericho, Christian and Trish could have had this pitched to them and dismissed it. They are wrestlers, they want to be taken seriously and don’t want to be doing teen romcom storylines. BUT, through the sheer effort they all put in to setting the scene (plus the crazy ass workrate Jericho and Christian brought to this match) the whole goofy deal was considered a runaway success. I forgot how great this match actually was.
Trish Stratus acts like she’s going to apologise to Jericho…but then slaps him in the face and leaves with Christian. The guy who shoved her over seconds earlier and beat the sh*t out of her on TV a few weeks ago. Maybe she likes it rough?? On the bright side, the ensuing heel run was possibly the best period of her career.
Lillian Garcia is backstage with Mick Foley. Mick seems subdued, so gets a pep talk from The Rock. ‘Don’t look at the People’s Package, Lillian’. Rock is so vibrant and hyped that his promo takes him all the way into the crowd.
Randy Orton/Batista/Ric Flair vs Rock’n’Sock Connection
As we saw with Orton’s promo earlier, there is so much history between he and Mick Foley. He officially became a Legend Killer when he assaulted Mick in this very building last summer. The scars of that beating still weigh heavily on Foley, who has been assaulted by Evolution again countless times since and even pulled out of a scheduled match with Randy because he didn’t feel capable of competing. But we saw signs of Foley’s willingness to fight Orton at the Royal Rumble – when he forced his way into the Rumble match at the last minute with the sole purpose of eliminating Orton. With Evolution threatening to overwhelm him through sheer numbers, Mick put a call in to his old friend in Hollywood…and Rock was only too happy to come back and earn a WrestleMania payday. We know Rock loves any excuse to mess with HHH and his cronies, so he returns tonight to reform the legendary Rock’n’Sock Connection – hoping once and for all to put the big mouths and brash attitudes of Evolution firmly in their place. Don’t forget Foley and Flair also have beef going back over a decade.
Mick really is in decent shape here. Despite having problems with motivation he has no problems assisting Rock in clearing the ring of Evolution. Flair doesn’t take kindly to The Rock impersonating him and breaks out a poke to the eyes. BACK DROP ON THE FLOOR BY ROCK! CACTUS ELBOW BY FOLEY! Orton and Mick brawl on the outside, right in Foley’s element so he gains the advantage. The Rock tries to pile in on all three opponents but falls victim to some illegal intervention from both Flair and Batista. It’s that same pairing that take turns working the Great One over. Since it’s a WrestleMania crowd there are a few more ‘smart fans’ than usual, and they ensure that Flair is getting HUGE pops. There are audible sections who actually boo Rock whenever he fires back at the Nature Boy. Batista blocks Foley’s Double Arm DDT then tosses him to the floor where Orton is waiting. Naitch has to help Orton escape the Mandible Claw, but when he does Randy flings him into the ring steps. He collided with them legs-first and once again Flair is roundly cheered as he starts working those legs. Orton isn’t sensible enough to continue with that strategy, but he does make sure to rake and claw at Mick’s face as if to directly taunt both him and his partner. The hot tag to Rocky does eventually come…only for his momentum to get totally snuffed out with Batista’s spinebuster. PEOPLE’S ELBOW BY FLAIR…BLOCKED! The crowd were seriously eating up Flair’s act there and plenty of boo’s are heard as Rock takes him down for the actual People’s Elbow (with additional Flair strutting). RKO countered to the Rock Bottom! Flair has gone insane on the floor, distracting the ref for long enough to allow Batista to save Randy with the Batista Bomb. Foley gives Orton the Double Arm DDT then reaches into his sweatpants for Mr Socko. MANDIBLE CLAW COUNTERED TO THE RKO! Orton pins Foley at 17:00!
Rating - *** - I’m not sure they needed seventeen minutes for this, even with the amount of star power it included. However, they worked the tag formula extremely well and I never felt like the crowd had become bored or uninterested. Mick seemed extremely motivated by this feud with Orton and the work he’d done with his cardio and conditioning really did pay off – and he was probably more mobile here than he was during a lot of his work as Mankind in ‘98/’99. At the Royal Rumble I praised Ric Flair for working extremely hard in a pointless match where his effort went completely unappreciated. He had his working boots on again here and the crowd absolutely adored him. He was almost as over as a babyface as Rock or Foley in truth. Every time he poked an eye, threw a woo or a chop, or broke into a strut the place went nuts for him. His People’s Elbow parody was truly hysterical.
Gene Okerlund has recovered from his orgy and totters out onto the stage to introduce the 2004 Hall Of Fame class.
Sable/Torrie Wilson vs Stacy Keibler/Miss Jackie – Playboy Evening Gown Match
Despite being an Evening Gown Match, Tony Chimel informs us that a winner is declared by pinfall or submission rather than stripping a woman naked. I’m not sure what makes this a ‘Playboy’ Evening Gown Match, other than the fact that Torrie and Sable have both appeared in that magazine. Didn’t Jackie Gayda (Miss Jackie) kick up a stink after her release because she felt pressured to pose for the publication when she didn’t want to? She and Stacy are representing the Raw brand, whilst their opponents are from Smackdown.
Sable and Torrie want to wrestle with their gowns off…so obviously Stacy and Jackie have to do likewise. Is this now a Playboy Lingerie Match? Jackie tries to refuse to take her gown off, so has it ripped from her by the Smackdown girls. Torrie hits an actual flying crossbody from the top rope on Gayda…but then walks into the same cartwheel/leg choking combo that Stacy does in every match she wrestles. You’d think Stacy and Torrie would be better at the same damn false finish combo they work in every match together too. Jackie and Torrie do the obligatory ‘roll over the ref/call him a perv’ act, and Torrie wins by grabbing Jackie’s ass whilst pinning her at 02:32
Rating - N/A - I’ll do as I’ve done previously for matches like this and give these woman an ‘N/A’ pass for the match. Other than Torrie’s crossbody it was all shamefully amateur, but all four of them deserve all the credit in the world for agreeing to go out and wrestle in their underwear.
Michael Cole tries to hype up what a global event WrestleMania is, and how fans fly from all over the world to attend. Apparently none of the fans from Germany, Australia, Japan or Fiji wanted to be interviewed, so only a bunch of over-excited, dorky British fans make it on camera.
WWE Champion Eddie Guerrero tries to prepare Chris Benoit for the main event, but in his own lovable way does more to damage Benoit’s confidence than bolster it. Benoit is pumped and vows that tonight will he his night.
WWE Cruiserweight Title Open Invitational
This is a Gauntlet Match in all but name. We have ten cruiserweights in the locker room, drawn to come out in a certain order. When one cruiserweight is eliminated the next comes out to replace him, with the last man standing leaving WrestleMania as Cruiserweight Champion. Chavo Guerrero is the defending champion having defeated Rey Mysterio controversially at No Way Out. Mysterio is also in this, along with other high profile juniors like Jamie Noble, Tajiri plus Ultimo Dragon clocking in for his WrestleMania paycheck.
To save time all ten guys come out before the bell rings. Ultimo Dragon and Shannon Moore start. Moore misses a corkscrew pescado and eats the Asai DDT allowing Dragon to advance at 01:18. Jamie Noble is in next, struggling to deal with the speed of Ultimo. Asai DDT countered with a neckbreaker though, and Noble advances with the Guillotine Choke at 02:17. Funaki is #4 and barely lasts four seconds, instantly getting rolled up at 02:22. Nunzio is #5, trying to make friends with Noble since they are cousins. Or is that angle forgotten? There’s a loud ‘Little Guido’ chant for Nunzio’s appearance which I dig. Guido takes a hell of a bump on the floor…and Noble goes after him with a TOP ROPE SOMERSAULT PLANCHA! Nunzio is counted out, eliminating him at 04:15. Billy Kidman enters next but Nunzio is still irritated and trying to fight with Noble. SPRINGBOARD SHOOTING STAR TO THE FLOOR BY KIDMAN! Except his SSP is almost as bad as Brock Lesnar’s last year so he nearly kills all three of them! Guillotine Choke blocked…BK BOMB! Noble is gone at 06:05. Rey Mysterio is in now, flying in with the springboard seated senton on his former Filthy Animals partner. Akio (Jimmy Yang) and Chavo Guerrero join forces to try and distract Rey, leading to him taking a BK Bomb from Kidman. AVALANCE CODE RED BY REY! He eliminates Billy at 07:26. The field is starting to thin now and Tajiri marches in to get his obligatory Tarantula pop. Handspring Elbow blocked with a dropkick…then the 619! West Coast Pop ducked...and Akio reappears on the apron trying to help Tajiri! ACCIDENTAL GREEN MIST ON AKIO! Mysterio pins a stunned Tajiri at 08:33. Apparently Akio is so wounded by the Green Mist he doesn’t even get to enter at all, so we’re down to the final two of Mysterio and Chavo…who should probably just have had a straight rematch from No Way Out on this card anyway. WEST COAST POP! SOMERSAULT PLANCHA OVER THE REF INTO CHAVO CLASSIC! Chavo Sr. recovers enough to assist his son in an illegal pin, giving Guerrero the win at 10:25. He retains the Cruiserweight Title
Rating - *** - I’ve not seen a lot of praise around for this one, and I was expecting it to be bad. I can’t pretend I wouldn’t rather have seen a Chavo/Mysterio rematch of course…but actually this was a rather pleasant surprise. I would liken it to the Hardcore Battle Royal at WrestleMania 16, except with random Cruiserweight high spots replacing the Mean Street Posse, Viscera and baking tray shots to the head. Of course there were too many talents involved, and of course it was a mad rush but it was actually quite enjoyable watching guys pop in, hit a couple of crazy spots, then leave. Billy Kidman’s SSP to the floor was nuts, Nunzio getting a Little Guido pop was awesome, Noble did some cool little filler bits during his tenure in the ring, seeing the legendary Ultimo Dragon at just one WrestleMania was a novel experience and Rey Mysterio was on FIRE during his cameo. I didn’t take this seriously at all, and in the end I found it good, mindless fun. Far more enjoyable than Matt Hardy and Rey Mysterio barely getting enough time do get down the giant aisle to the ring like last year. Was Paul London injured? If not where was he?
Brock Lesnar vs Goldberg
This is our second inter-promotional match of the evening, and in many ways you can expect it to be every bit as farcical as the Playboy Evening Gown Match we saw earlier. These two have been at odds for months, culminating at No Way Out when Goldberg, upset that Lesnar caused him to be eliminated from the Royal Rumble, invaded a Smackdown pay-per-view and cost Brock the WWE Championship. The real story here, though, is that these two were seriously hard to manage at this point. Brock just didn’t want to wrestle anymore and Goldberg just wanted to get out of the WWE. Both their contracts expired after WrestleMania and it was pretty common knowledge neither was going to re-sign. Steve Austin is positioned as guest referee, which I find a rather unfair tease since Austin/Lesnar and Austin/Goldberg would both be genuine dream matches. Instead his role will be to control these two combustible forces – even though his impartiality may be questioned after getting into a fist fight with Lesnar on Raw. In reality his only role here wound up being to give the hostile crowd someone to cheer for when they spectacularly turned on both participants.
Seeing Goldberg’s trademark entrance at WrestleMania is pretty awesome. It’s a real shame this didn’t work out as I really like both of these guys. The crowd absolutely SH*T on this from literally the opening bell – with a ‘you sold out’ chant so loud the WWE Home Video editing crew didn’t even bother trying to edit it. Next it’s ‘Na Na Hey…Goodbye’ treatment, forcing JR to admit to the rumours of Lesnar wanting to go to the NFL. Even Stone Cold can’t help but laugh as he gets a standing ovation just for showing up. I can’t help but feel like Goldberg and Brock make it far worse for themselves by not even trying to wrestle for more than three minutes. ‘This match sucks’ – New York. Given that they are wrestling it like it’s 1981 and spending an age over the most basic of exchanges, it’s not surprising that they are getting crapped on. MILITARY PRESS SPEAR BY GOLDBERG! If he did sh*t like that more often during his run he’d have been way more successful. Sadly for him he misses the Spear as the arena breaks out into deafening ‘Goldberg sucks’ chants. A ‘Hogan’ chant breaks out next and since the majority of the crowd aren’t watching Lesnar and Goldberg work a lengthy chinlock spot, I presume a guy in costume is now genuinely more over than two former World Champions. Credit to Goldberg, he is putting in some effort and trying to sell the shoulder Brock has been targeting. Jim Ross now describes the match as ‘very pedestrian’…which isn’t a compliment. SPEAR! The crowd are furious when Brock kicks out…but it does lead to an EPIC staredown between Goldberg and Steve Austin. Goldberg hits the Spear/Jackhammer combo to win at 13:41
Rating - ** - At another time, under better circumstances, this could have drawn money as a legitimate dream match. As hot as Lesnar has been in 2014/2015, I bet if they booked Brock vs Goldberg now people would love it. I’m a documented fan of both guys, and I’ve gone on record as saying Goldberg could have been a huge success in WWE were he not fundamentally misunderstood and mismanaged from the moment he debuted. Unfortunately for them both, this just wasn’t their night. New York fans have a rowdy reputation, and it was an amazing spectacle seeing a WWE arena crowd completely rebel against something like this. I think Brock and Bill (plus Austin as ref) could have been smarter and called an audible to shorten the match and run something a little more action packed to try to quell the audience. The crowd had SO much time to chant whatever the hell they wanted because the two wrestlers spent huge portions of the match doing almost nothing. Lesnar had checked out by this point and didn’t put in a whole lot of effort (particularly once the crowd turned on him), but I did feel bad for Goldberg who was visibly working hard but got this, his only WrestleMania appearance, ruined anyway. As a match it was pretty mediocre, but as a spectacle it really is memorable and a really unique aspect of this WrestleMania which has lived long in the memory. Amazingly it would still take years for the WWE to finally admit that kayfabe was dead and declare a ‘Reality Era’…
Brock Lesnar deservedly gets his moment to say goodbye to the fans – by throwing up middle fingers at them. I think you can visibly see Austin encouraging him to do so too. Stone Cold eventually clears him from the ring with a crowd pleasing Stunner, then shares a beer with Goldberg. Seeing the faces of the WWF and WCW in the late 90’s show respect to each other is a genuinely iconic moment even if this particular audience wants to dump on it. Of course, this is Vince McMahon’s show and WCW’s biggest star has to finish his WWE career on his back. It’s obviously a popular decision in the Garden though – and Austin does the honours with another Stunner.
Speaking of the Garden, we cut to external shots of the famous building as it erupts in fireworks to celebrate WrestleMania’s anniversary. Vince McMahon makes a rare on-camera appearance without his ‘Mr McMahon’ character to thank the fans of his company.
Rikishi/Scotty 2 Hotty vs World’s Greatest Tag Team vs Acolytes vs Basham Brothers – WWE Tag Title Match
I suppose this one has marginally more build than Raw’s Tag Title Match, if only because these four teams met in standard 2-vs-2 matches last month at No Way Out. WGTT got a convincing victory over the APA, whilst Rikishi and Scotty have been feuding with the Bashams over the Tag Titles for a few weeks or so.
Shelton starts with Bradshaw, and it won’t surprise you one bit to know that JBL is ignoring everything his rival throws at him to hit all his usual clubbing spots. He softens up Benjamin, and the Bashams look to profit on that by blind-tagging their way in. Haas doesn’t do much better, getting such an ass kicking from S2H that Scotty finds time to throw some novelty moonwalking in too. WGTT have had enough of being whipping boys and give Scotty the Broken Arrow for 2. The sheer excitement on the faces of the Bashams when they don’t screw up a basic double suplex spot is pretty sad. They are the very definition of the complacency and ineptitude that surrounded WWE’s recruitment and development policy at this point. After all the excitement of the Goldberg/Lesnar tragicomedy the New York fans are obviously recovering and have regressed into near total silence. Not that there’s much to cheer about. WGTT get taken out by Rikishi’s ass…then get Danny Basham thrown at them as Bradshaw hits his fallaway slam over the top rope. Clothesline From Hell on Doug! He tries it on Rikishi as well but he counters it into a Samoan drop. This match is so pointless big Kish can’t even be bothered to climb the turnbuckles – he simply hits a standing butt splash on Doug for the win at 06:00
Rating - * - If anything this was even more ineffective than Raw’s Tag Title Match, and this one actually did have a modicum of build to it. As usual Bradshaw crushed everyone and offered very little in return. Faarooq legitimately wasn’t involved in the match at all. WGTT (the only team with any real talent) were roundly squashed and things got so boring the only positive I can take from this is that the Bashams weren't as totally useless as they normally are.
A video package plays hyping the return of Edge, who hasn’t been seen since No Way Out 2003 due to a severe neck injury – the first of many, sadly for him.
Jesse Ventura comes out to interview Donald Trump, but as usual uses the opportunity to ramble on about his political career instead.
Victoria vs Molly Holly – WWE Women’s Title Hair vs Hair Match
At least the women don’t get shoved out in the total death spot between the main events for once. And both of these two have talent so even though this will obviously be brief, I’m hopeful that we may see a little quality in the token WrestleMania Women’s Title affair this year.
Boo, the WWE Network dubs out Tatu. Molly is obviously pissed off about it too since she starts out with plenty of aggression. She goes so far as to smash Victoria onto the floor of the arena with a running clothesline. The champion has had neck problems so it’s pretty cool to see Holly start working that body part. Lawler, as usual, wheels out the ‘fat virgin’ jokes and does his best to degrade and negate the action as much as possible. Eventually Molly misses an elbow drop aimed at the neck and walks into a powerslam for 2. Unfortunately for Victoria she gets her injured neck draped over the bottom rope with a drop toehold moments later. ‘I didn’t prepare to talk about panties’ – JR. Molly drops Victoria on her neck again with a sunset flip bomb, although it looks so tame that even Jim Ross has to call her on it. She tries to steal Victoria’s own finisher (the Widow’s Peak) but sees herself countered to a backslide – giving Vic the win at 04:53
Rating - ** - Pretty low key, and Lawler’s commentary was so nonsensically bad that even JR seemed to be getting annoyed by it, but actually the wrestling wasn’t half bad. Molly structuring the whole match around the attack on the neck was an interesting watch and I thought the finish was just perfect as it played up a wounded champion doing anything just to survive. Not even the head shaving consequences of this match could rouse much interest from the crowd, but I enjoyed watching it.
Molly runs off before her head can be shaved (after socking Victoria in the neck again), but eventually gets caught and strapped into the barber’s chair. Smart portions of the crowd realise getting her head shaved is just the latest in a long line of humiliations throughout Molly’s WWE career and actually chant for her rather than cheer during the head shaving. Good for them.
Eddie Guerrero vs Kurt Angle – WWE Title Match
Some of the things that Kurt would later get up to (and be convicted of) make a lot of this feud rather laughable in hindsight. He objected to having a ‘drug addict’, lying, cheating, stealing WWE Champion and vowed to take the belt from Eddie even if the fans didn’t like it. With a little assistance from Smackdown GM Paul Heyman along the way Kurt was able to dish out several vicious beatings, but was never able to extinguish Eddie’s fiery Latino Heat. After overcoming insurmountable odds to finally get his hands on the title last month at No Way Out there’s no way Eddie will want to lose it in his first pay-per-view defence, and on the biggest stage in his profession.
Great stat from Michael Cole, who says that this is the 20th WWE Title match at WrestleMania, and thus far only four men have successfully retained. We begin with a tense battle on the mat where, despite his best efforts, Eddie is always going to be out-matched. However, it’s equally clear that Kurt keenly fears Guerrero’s speed and fire so does all he can to keep the champion grounded and in his clutches. Three Amigos COUNTERED to a German suplex! Eddie grabs the ropes to block the rolling German sequence…so Angle floats to the apron and tries to German him to the floor instead! EDDIE EATS GUARDRAIL AFTER A TOP ROPE PLANCHA! He seems to injure his ribs during that, which Angle spots and quickly pounces on with ribbreakers and a grounded bodyscissors. The injury adds extra potency to Kurt’s signature belly to belly suplexes which he snaps off with ruthless efficiency before clutching onto a bearhug. Rope run belly to belly blocked...but Eddie MISSES THE FROG SPLASH! He writhes on the canvas in pain and is set upon by the challenger again who peppers his midsection with punches and stomps. Somehow Guerrero hits a back suplex, dropping Angle on his neck…and we immediately see the effects of that as Angle is rendered unable to hit his usual flurry of German suplexes. Lucha armdrag to counter the Angle Slam, before he wraps his legs around the neck with a satellite headscissors. THREE AMIGOS…COUNTERED TO THE ANKLELOCK! But since Kurt hasn’t worked the leg Eddie is able to roll over and kick his way free. ROPE RUN BELLY TO BELLY SUPLEX BY ANGLE! GERMAN SUPLEX! TORNADO DDT TO COUNTER THE ANGLE SLAM! FROG SPLASH! KURT KICKS OUT! ANKLELOCK! Eddie counters and kicks Kurt to the floor! He unlaces his boot and rolls around clutching his ankle, implying he may have a broken ankle. But it’s all a cunning plan! Angle tries to put him in another Anklelock, but this time he slips out of his unlaced boot, small packages him using the ropes and cheats to another win at 21:32!
Rating - **** - To be ultra-critical I’d say that they probably started far too slowly for this audience. Personally I thought the early wrestling was outstanding and utterly packed with tension and subtle story-telling nods, but a packed MSG crowd watching a show already well into it’s fourth hour may not be overly receptive to that. As such, things felt a little dry at first even though I really dug what they were going for. Things picked up with Guerrero’s dive to the floor though, and for twenty minutes it was a real privilege to watch these two wily performers lock horns. The brilliance of Eddie’s gimmick was that they always had an ‘out’ to put him over their established main event guys without adversely damaging them. Lesnar was protected by Goldberg, and another crafty finish here Kurt has an out too. And the cheap finishes were absolutely beloved because they were part of the unique charm that was Eddie Guerrero at this point in time. Having had his ass handed to him, his ribs battered and his ankle torn up by an Olympic Champion, Eddie once again devised a genius strategy to overcome a supposed superior athlete. A wonderful WrestleMania moment for him, and another extremely well-wrestled match from the ever-reliable Kurt Angle.
Undertaker vs Kane
At Survivor Series 2003 we saw the demise of the American Badass. The persona Undertaker had adopted since his return to the promotion at Judgment Day 2000 was murdered by his own brother. Kane helped Mr McMahon bury Undertaker in their Buried Alive Match…and we’ve not seen him since. Kane complained that the brother he knew was long gone, and he didn’t sympathise with the crowd-pleasing, motorbike riding HUMAN he had become. The Big Red Machine vowed that we’d never see his brother again…but around the turn of the year he started to be haunted by ominous gongs, creepy video packages and spooky special effects. We’ve been promised that the ‘dead will rise again’ tonight, as the Phenom returns from ‘beyond the grave’ to gain revenge on his brother.
Kane’s entrance, with New York burning behind him, is pretty awesome…but of course pales in comparison to the sheer spectacle of the return of the Deadman, along with druids and Paul Bearer. Both of these guys are in amazing shape too. After playing an unstable monster for months, Kane is now petrified…and closes his eyes refusing to believe his brother is real. He reaches out to touch him and is promptly swarmed with a barrage of body shots. ‘How do you like that, son?’ – Bearer to Kane as he is battered by Taker. Kane musters up some offence but appears powerless to keep his brother on the canvas for any significant period of time. Plenty of punch/kick duels ensue and it’s clear they didn’t have much planned for this beyond ‘people will like Undertaker’. Kane counters the Old School Ropewalk with a Chokeslam…leaving Taker flat out on the canvas. The crowd instantly start to buzz because they know the ‘sit up’ is coming, then pop when he finally does it. Undertaker hits an extremely crappy Chokeslam, which even post-production jazzy camera angles can’t cover. The match eventually ends with a Tombstone Piledriver on Kane at 07:42
Rating - ** - I’m a longstanding critic of these two in the same ring together. Their tag team sucked, and their matches against each other are normally even worse. To give credit where it’s due, they were both in awesome shape here so at least this one was a little quicker and more mobile than some of their more ponderous slug-outs. Both of these two have had tremendous careers and it was fitting that the ‘Deadman’ character should make his return against Kane, and it provided a wonderful WrestleMania moment - but if I’d been booking this I’d have made it considerably shorter. Nothing kills the buzz of Taker’s character quicker than elongated punchy/kicky brawls…particularly when we’re supposed to believe this is an undead Phenom who shoots fire and can survive being buried alive. Being even more critical, I didn’t think they changed his look enough either. I appreciate he couldn’t have grown his hair anymore, but nothing says ‘undead monster’ LESS than a white elbow sleeve (couldn’t they have found a black one at least?), MMA gloves and the same leather pants/blank singlet combo he’d been wearing as the American Badass for years. His entrance was really memorable, but as usual people look back on the actual in-ring content through rose-tinted glasses. I actually think 2* was pretty generous overall.
Triple H vs Shawn Michaels vs Chris Benoit – World Heavyweight Title Match
As we know, traditionally the winner of the Royal Rumble is the man that gets to pick his spot in the main event of WrestleMania. Smackdown’s Chris Benoit opted to come to Raw and demanded to challenge HHH here tonight. But unfortunately that meant he was inserting himself into the middle of the lengthy and violent feud between Helmsley and his former best friend Shawn Michaels. At the Rumble those two fought to a bloody double TKO draw over the title – leaving Michaels frustrated because he felt he was due a rematch. When Steve Austin refused to book it for him, Shawn attacked Benoit and basically forced his way into the equation – with a triple threat eventually being used as the compromise to keep all parties (except The Game) happy. Now we have so many questions waiting to be answered in our main event. Will Benoit be able to finally ‘win the big one’ in the biggest match of his entire career? Will Michaels finally end his war with Triple H? Will the burgeoning animosity and sizeable egos of Benoit and HBK ultimately prevent them from concentrating on the big prize of HHH’s championship? And perhaps the biggest question of all – exactly how much Benoit eulogising have the production squad had to edit out or overdub just to make this suitable for broadcast on the WWE Network? Given that JR is basically cut-off in mid-sentence during a pre-match graphic, I’m guessing plenty…
Benoit is the overwhelming favourite inside MSG, and is roared on as he tries to put Michaels in an early Crossface. They disagree over who it is that gets to beat on HHH, and wind up knocking the champion out of the ring where he can crouch and watch them tear it up on the canvas. Once Benoit has been tossed Hunter returns looking to decapitate his former friend with a jumping knee strike. The Wolverine’s back takes a pounding against the apron as Michaels climbs for a MOONSAULT TO THE FLOOR, landing on top of both his rivals! HHH looks to finish it quickly with a Pedigree on Shawn, and when it’s broken by Benoit it’s Michaels that takes the brunt of his aggression by getting darted into the ringpost. Hunter pounds at Chris’ bad neck before he tree of woes him and tosses HBK into his exposed torso. A running lariat from Benoit knocks Michaels to the floor as he lines up his top rope elbow, leaving the ring free for ROLLING GERMANS on The Game! Michaels returns just in time to crotch the Canadian as he thinks about the Flying Wolverine. Sweet Chin Music countered to a DDT by Helmsley, leaving him alone with Benoit. Ten minutes in and this has been all-action, compulsive viewing. Crippler Crossface briefly applied before Shawn flies back into the match to break it. The crowd roundly boos Shawn as he gets into a GERMAN SUPLEX DUEL WITH BENOIT! Of course the Crippler wins that then climbs the ropes for the Flying Wolverine! Michaels to the top rope next, taking flight into the Macho Elbow on HHH. SWEET CHIN MUSIC! Benoit breaks the pin! He splits Shawn’s head wide by sending him into the ringpost again…then instantly looks to squeeze that bloody head with another Crossface. Shawn reaches hand out to tap and is only prevented by the returning Triple H grabbing his arm! With Shawn now a non-factor, Hunter focuses his efforts on neutralising the Royal Rumble winner. The Smackdown and Spanish announce tables are both stripped as the two do battle across them. German suplex blocked…Pedigree blocked…and Shawn Michaels is here too! D-X DOUBLE SUPLEX BENOIT THROUGH THE SMACKDOWN ANNOUNCE TABLE! A bloody HBK returns to the ring and summons his great enemy back to the ring so they can settle it finally. Camera men fall like pins in a bowling alley as their brawl goes all over ringside and soon Helmsley is bleeding too. PEDIGREE! BOTH MEN DOWN! Finally HHH crawls over to make a pin – and BENOIT BREAKS IT! SHARPSHOOTER ON TRIPLE H! SHAWN BREAKS IT WITH SWEET CHIN MUSIC! He tries a second time…but gets back dropped over the ropes by Benoit! PEDIGREE…COUNTERED TO THE CRIPPLER CROSSFACE! HHH WON’T QUIT! BENOIT ROLLS IT TO THE MIDDLE OF THE RING! THE CHAMP TAPS! Benoit wins at 24:47
Rating - ****1/2 - One cannot escape the ugly associations this now has with it, but looking at it purely as a wrestling match I still think they knocked it out of the park. Triple threats are always a tough sell, but these three meshed together so well and created moments of incredible drama. I don’t give WWE credit for their booking as often as perhaps I should, because they’d worked their fans amazingly well with this story. The crowd were on the edge of their seats wondering whether the status quo would be broken. Did the company trust Benoit enough to give him the title when they didn’t trust him enough to sell a main event by himself? Would it be the usual Raw default position of HHH as champion regardless of how much sense it made? Would they actually ignore Benoit altogether and stick with the ‘trusted’ two of Michaels and HHH? Some of the normal problems with triple threats were still present, but on the whole this was a rollercoaster ride of emotions which had you believing any of the three participants could potentially have been leaving WrestleMania 20 as World Champion. I can’t pretend it’s as emotionally satisfying and as joyful to watch as it was back in 2004 now we know what Benoit would go on to do. But if you are able to compartmentalise that and can still focus on some incredible wrestling, this match is still among the best WrestleMania main events of all time.
Chris Benoit is in floods of tears as he is presented with the ‘big gold belt’…and another crying figure appears alongside him. Eddie Guerrero, carrying the WWE Title, joins him for an incredibly emotional hug as streamers and confetti fill Madison Square Garden. The scenes at the end of this show are hard to watch for so many reasons.
Tape Rating - **** - One thing is for certain about this show. It clocks in at the best part of FIVE hours long, so you are damn sure getting your money’s worth. It’s not an entirely consistent watch, it has peaks and troughs…but on the whole it delivered all the pageantry and spectacle you expect from WWE’s biggest show of the year, with the added bonus of some awesome wrestling matches too. For workrate fans seeing Benoit and Guerrero as World Champions was a joy (at the time). Seeing killer matches like Jericho/Christian, Eddie/Angle and Benoit/HHH/Michaels all packed into a Mania card mean you’re getting plenty of top notch in-ring action. But this show had so much more than that which makes it special and memorable to this day. John Cena started the show in style by claiming the first singles championship of his legendary career. The Trish heel turn didn’t make much sense, but led to probably the strongest period of her own legendary career. Three legends of the industry in Rock, Foley and Flair all busted their asses to put over two future World Champions in Randy Orton and Batista. We had the return of the Undertaker and the comically farcical but nevertheless hugely memorable departures of Lesnar and Goldberg. The visual of Stone Cold and Goldberg, the faces of their respective companies during wrestling’s hottest period, sharing a beer was truly memorable too. Throw in a diva head shaving, cruiserweights flying around like cartoon characters, Hall Of Famers, hot girls in lingerie – there really is something for everyone on this card. It’s not the most consistent watch, it doesn’t pack in as many great matches as some other Manias, and of course the ending will inevitably turn some fans’ stomachs. But expectations were seriously high for the twentieth annual WrestleMania and I feel like the WWE did a hell of a job celebrating the past, enjoying the present, embracing the future...and trying their best to appease as great a number of fans as possible.
Top 3 Matches
3) Christian vs Chris Jericho (****)
2) Eddie Guerrero vs Kurt Angle (****)
1) Triple H vs Chris Benoit vs Shawn Michaels (****1/2)