ROH 409 – Conquest Tour 2016: San Antonio – 23rd April 2016

Supercard Of Honor 10 weekend is in the books, and with ROH pretty much relying on the strength of the NJPW brand name alone as a selling tool for the forthcoming Global Wars pay-per-view, I’m not quite sure what to expect with these final two stops on the 2016 Conquest Tour. ROH haven’t delivered a bad live show yet this year (I’ve totally cursed this one now haven’t I)…but these events seem worryingly devoid of significant content. Admittedly the main event for this show – BJ Whitmer facing Adam Page in a Street Fight – has received a lot of build, and we do have a rematch in the ongoing Addiction/Motor City Machine Guns feud…but everything else looks decided B-show. There’s no Adam Cole (who has gone into exile after losing to O’Reilly in Dallas), Matt Sydal, Cedric Alexander, Lio Rush, Donovan Dijak, Dalton Castle, Michael Elgin, War Machine etc, the Young Bucks are stuck working Cheeseburger, and Jay Lethal is in a ‘Proving Ground Instant Reward’ Six Man Mayhem; a gimmick which rarely delivers anything of real quality. But Ring Of Honor has earned some faith with their outstanding first quarter of the year – let’s see how they can surprise us tonight. Kevin Kelly and Mr Wrestling III provide commentary from San Antonio, TX.

Silas Young vs Mark Briscoe
Two men who are deeply involved in the crowded tag team scene meet in singles action here. Mark and his brother Jay get their shot at War Machine’s Tag Championship at Global Wars, whilst Silas and his partner Beer City Bruiser are looking to work back into contention after failing to win the belts at Supercard Of Honor 10. Mark Briscoe has won a LOT of matches over the past eighteen months or so, therefore a win for the Last Real Man would be a real coup for him.

Jesus, this crowd is nuts! Mark gets a ridiculous ovation. Silas gets huge heat too as he grabs a microphone to run the fans down and announce his intention to out-wrestle Briscoe here. It doesn’t go very well though – he gets forcibly ejected from the ring over and over again. In the end he has to rake Mark’s eyes to get himself into the match, but then does start to show his wrestling skill by attacking the back. Briscoe uses his heavy striking to rally only to be put down again with the Killer Combo. It’s too early for the Plunge though, and Young just isn’t doing enough damage to stop Mark’s Redneck Kung Fu posing a threat. Misery blocked…Plunge misses…so a pissed off Young tries to pin Mark using the ropes and still only gets 2. Ace Crusher puts him down for a nearfall as well. Briscoe is in trouble…but runs into Young with a small package and snatches victory at 08:56

Rating - ** - The match was nothing special at all, but made somewhat memorable by a live crowd who treated it like the main event of WrestleMania. When a live crowd is SO into a match, even one as low key as this, it definitely adds an intangible aura of spectacle that makes everything better. Young was fun as the cranky heel (as always), Mark played the hits and kept the fans happy, and the finish didn’t harm the credibility of either competitor in the long term.

Will Ferrara vs Rhett Titus
I can’t pretend this is the match I was most looking forward to on the card (even with the knowledge that Will and Rhett would go on to form a team in the coming years). But, to give both men their credit, following changes to their character they are both doing their best ROH work in years. ANX’s post-Anniversary Show heel turn has delivered some strong promo work and made them both a lot more interesting. Ferrara has channelled the words of Prince Nana’s letters into a more aggressive style – which even saw him push Donovan Dijak to the limit in Dallas. Neither man are highly ranked as singles competitors right now though, meaning they both could really use a victory. 

Apparently these two are friends who train together and know each other well…but tend to get very competitive. Ferrara doesn’t take kindly to Titus belittling his height, and likes it even less when his supposed ‘friend’ cheap-shots him after being given a clean break. Rhett follows it with a nasty chest-first whip into the ropes then a diving front slam for 2. The size disadvantage is really hindering Ferrara, but he finds a way to counter Titus’ signature dropkick into a Samoan drop. ROPE RUN SUPER SEX FACTOR gets 2 for Titus! He socks his adversary again with his big lariat seconds later as well. He scores with a Ligerbomb for another close nearfall, as we start to wonder what Will has left in the tank. Razor’s Edge nailed…AND GETS ONE! Ferrara shakes his head and refused to be beaten. He hiptosses Titus to the floor, into prime position for the TOPE SUICIDA DDT ON THE FLOOR! Swinging DDT back in, right into a jumping flatliner for a HOT nearfall. Titus has seen enough, and finishes his buddy off with the Rhett-ribution DDT at 09:14

Rating - *** - Like many I wasn’t expecting much from this, and it really surprised me. Titus is moving as well as he has in years, Ferrara is starting to gain some traction as a fiery smaller athlete who shows no fear. Those elements, coupled with strong work from Kelly and Mr Wrestling to tell the story of two training partners, friends and competitive rivals trying to one-up each other, and suddenly there was some real emotional depth to this. Titus was a bit of a jerk and used his size to dominate but he couldn’t put his opponent away and nearly lost after a spectacular comeback flurry in the closing moments. 

Titus wants to shake Ferrara’s hand, but is stopped by his tag partner Kenny King. He rants about how the San Antonio fans have changed since their comeback at All Star Extravaganza last year, then calls out Bobby Fish for their match…

Kenny King vs Bobby Fish
Bobby is preparing for the sizeable challenge of trying to take the Television Title from Tomohiro Ishii at Global Wars. He comes in hot after his 2/3 Falls victory over Roderick Strong and is on the hunt for more high profile singles victories to build more momentum. King may be part of All Night Express, but he is also a seasoned singles wrestler by this point in his career and will harbour his own singles ambitions. A win over Fish here makes him a top contender should he win the belt from the Stone Pitbull in Chicago, so there is much to gain for Kenny too.

Bobby Fish revels in being as annoying as possible to his opponents, and he clearly unsettles the already-grouchy King. He nearly falls victim to an early cross armbreaker from the lethal technician he stands across the ring from…and flees the ring to discuss strategy with Titus (who has remained at ringside). Fish pisses him off further by hopping out of the ring himself seconds later, and when Kenny tries to punish him with a dive from the apron, Bobby simply kicks his legs out from under him. He tries to work King’s leg, but to Kenny’s credit he fights it off and delivers an emphatic corkscrew enzi which knocks Fish out of the ring. Back inside he works a camel clutch (with additional fish hooking of the mouth) and has Bobby so hurt he basically has to hide under the ropes to buy some time. He rallies with some strikes…and then dumps King on his head with the turnbuckle exploder. Kenny retaliates with a spinebuster for 2. Royal Flush blocked, but Kenny ducks a Buzzsaw kick and counters to a half crab. Bobby kicks his way free and dragon screws the leg to get King away from him. Kenny hurts his own leg again missing a heel kick, and stumbles into the Fish Hook Deluxe! King taps at 10:46

Rating - *** - This one was really good, and felt like they had only just begun to scratch the surface of what they could do together when the match ended. Both of these men have been wrestling for a long time, and all of that experience showed in the way they meshed their styles together. I really wanted to see more of this.

The Addiction vs Motor City Machine Guns
There is an argument to be made that this is the biggest drawing match on the card tonight. We have two experienced teams, with years of television exposure through both TNA and ROH (plus some WCW, WWE and ECW experience on The Addiction’s side too), embroiled in an ongoing feud after Chris Sabin left his group with Frankie and Daniels to reform the Motor City Machine Guns. Their heated rivalry has even expanded to consume the Young Bucks as well. Both teams will want to walk out of San Antonio with the bragging rights that come with victory.

Sabin starts with Kazarian, who really doesn’t like him. The Addiction try to double-team him, but Shelley is quickly on the scene and the Machine Guns clean house. It takes a cheap shot from Daniels to Sabin’s exposed neck to bring the men that used to be known as ‘Bad Influence’ into the ascendancy. Shelley tags in…and when Daniels tries the same cheap shot on him he counters it. That was really smart wrestling which I liked…and it gets even better when the Ring General out-thinks Alex by tripping him from the floor instead so Kaz can land a rebound leg drop. They work over Shelley’s midsection as Sabin watches on as a frustrated spectator. Eventually Alex does battle back to his corner though, allowing Sabin to vent all that frustration onto their adversaries. Daniels blocks Future Shock…only to be taken over with a German suplex by Shelley instead. DOUBLE TEAM swinging DDT gets 2 on the Fallen Angel! Kazarian rescues his partner from Made In Detroit and takes out Alex with the slingshot DDT. Assisted slingshot cutter from The Addiction to Sabin. Shelley returns in time to stop them hitting Celebrity Rehab…so is taken out with Bad Elimination. T-Gimmick on Sabin for 2! MW3 points out that everything Kaz and Daniels are doing punishes Sabin’s neck. He avoids Angel’s Wings though, joining his partner for the ASCS Rush. Skull & Bones beats Frankie and gives MCMG the big win at 13:46

Rating - *** - Are you a glass half-full or a glass half-empty kind of person? Dependent on your perspective this was either an entertaining tag bout and one of the best matches on the show so far, or alternatively it was very obviously a low key house show bout between two teams in an ongoing feud saving their bigger performances for more important shows. There is no denying this was a fun encounter, but compared to the way they let it all hang out at the recent Dallas shows for instance, this was definitely a lot more sedate. The Addiction did some really neat, detailed pieces of tag team wresting which really kept things interesting, but when it came to the crunch neither of them committed to going up through the gears. They certainly have better matches in them I’m quite sure.

The Addiction don’t deal with defeat very well, and duly attack the victors after the bell. They isolate Sabin for punishment and beat on his neck some more before giving him the BEST MELTZER EVER! Kelly and Mr Wrestling sell that as a savage assault on a man with neck issues…

Dirty Outlaws vs Keith Lee/Shane Taylor
For some reason the team of Andy Dalton and Ken Phoenix get their team name (Dirty Outlaws) included, but Lee and Taylor aren’t introduced as the ‘Pretty Boy Killers’ which is what they were known as (to the extent that fans chant ‘PBK’ during their entrance). We saw them briefly in 2015 and they’ve worked various pre-show matches since then. Bizarrely they weren’t part of the Top Prospect Tournament, with Lee in particular getting high praise whenever he does compete. Of course, it is easier writing that in 2019, when we know ROH missed the boat on him and he went on to have a strong indy career with the WWN Family before signing with WWE.

Andy Dalton wears Nasty Boyz inspired gear (and is apparently getting ready to tour with NOAH). The Outlaws try to jump their opponents…only to be swatted away by Lee then crushed by Taylor. Keith no-sells Phoenix’s offence with a smile on his face, before leapfrogging and running the ropes like a junior bloody heavyweight. Lee thinks about a dive but is stopped by Dirty Andy spitting water in his face. Hilariously the Outlaws then swarm Keith like insects, but just bounce off him with no damage done. Pounce wipes out Ken! Spirit Bomb takes out Dalton, giving PBK the win at 03:50

Rating - N/A - Lee and Taylor would already be signed were it not for the fact that ROH already have War Machine as a big man wrecking ball tag team. Keith Lee had star quality written all over him from the second he stepped through the curtain and was very obviously destined for big things. He’s big, but in better condition than his partner. He is stupidly agile for his size, and phenomenally powerful too. This was a legitimately entertaining squash match to get the Pretty Boy Killers over. Ring Of Honor has a decision to make about how they move forward with this act. They very clearly possess real talent

Delirious/Cheeseburger vs Young Bucks
Is Burger really so ‘popular in Japan’ that he is going to start getting high profile matches? Having said that, if anybody can find a way to make me enjoy a Cheeseburger match it’s Matt and Nick Jackson. They want to be the Tag Title mix, but need wins after failing to become #1 contenders in Dallas. Watching them interact with the comically undersized Cheeseburger and the perennially weird Delirious should be a lot of fun. It’s worth pointing out that Delirious and Cheese are technically a student/teacher team since the Lizard Man is the head trainer at the ROH Dojo. 

Matt Jackson trying to reason with the post-ring bell freaking out Delirious for the sole purpose of getting a ‘2 Sweet’ instantly has me chuckling. The Lizard Man is a little older and less active, but he’s still a lethal mat wrestler and he takes it to ground and works circles around Matt. SUPERKICKS on Burger and Delirious! Rise Of The Terminator topes nailed next! Cheeseburger tries to throw a Shotei back in Nick’s direction…as Delirious has taken such a beating he decides to join commentary instead. ‘This is a squash match’ – Nick Jackson as he dominates Burger. He proceeds to accidentally level his own partner with a running kick, although Cheese can’t make a tag as Delirious is in the midst of a heated argument with Todd Sinclair. Delirious gets a tag and uses all of his manic, unpredictable energy to take the fight to Nick. Leaping Lariat takes him down, before he tosses both Bucks into the corner for the Panic Attack. If he wasn’t weird enough, he takes a break from fighting the Young Bucks to eat some of his wrist tape. Yes you read that correctly. FOUR-WAY BACK RAKE DUEL! SUPERKICK PARTY! Burger throws some elbows and SHOTEI’S MATT’S LEG when going for a Superkick. SHADOWS OVER HELL NAILED! FOR 2! Mr Wrestling III acts like nobody has ever kicked out of that before. Back when he was an active wrestler I’m pretty sure they did in every match? Deliri-Burger set up for their version of a Meltzer Driver, but find it blocked with a Superkick from Matt. SUPERKICK FLURRY ON DELIRIOUS! HE WON’T GO DOWN! EARLY ONSET ALZHEIMER’S! Matt scoops up Cheeseburgers body and stands over Delirious’ broken corpse. THEY INDYTAKER BURGER THROUGH DELIRIOUS’ CHEST! The Bucks win at 11:59

Rating - *** - I gave real consideration to going to 4* on this. Ultimately I decided against it because it was a little bit too comedy-centric, and a little bit too reliant on being able to take Cheeseburger’s offence seriously. It did, however, have me laughing and smiling from the first bell until the last. The Young Bucks interacting with Delirious was really fun, and in all fairness to them, the last few minutes contained some extremely exciting straight wrestling. That finish in particular was so brutal. 

Jay Lethal vs ACH vs Roderick Strong vs Moose vs Kyle O’Reilly vs Jay Briscoe
This is a Proving Ground ‘Instant Reward’ match, meaning if anyone wins (they don’t have to beat Lethal himself) they will be rewarded with an immediate shot at the World Title. We have an eclectic mix of high-end talent stepping up to challenge reigning champion Lethal here, from former World Title holders like Roderick Strong and Jay Briscoe, to hometown favourites like ACH, to rising stars like Moose, through to O’Reilly who comes in off the back of one of the biggest wins of his career (over Adam Cole at Supercard Of Honor 10). Lethal has been hugely vocal about there being ‘no-one left’ for him to beat, but he has five men in the ring with him tonight who would beg to differ. He has history with most of them as well. His TV Title reign took in spectacular time-limit draws against both O’Reilly (whom he also faced as part of the 14th Anniversary and All Star Extravaganza 7 PPV main events) and ACH, he ended Jay Briscoe’s two year undefeated streak to take the World Title from him, and subsequently went on to contest a hell of a trilogy with Roderick Strong in the second half of 2015 (which included what many considered ROH’s MOTY at Death Before Dishonor, and losing the TV Title to him in the third match of the trilogy). 

Roddy looks to be in a particularly sour mood, antagonising everyone he comes across – from fans to wrestlers – whilst waiting for the bell to ring. He starts with his old pal Jay Briscoe and it doesn’t take long for the respectful wrestling to become super-aggressive strikes. Lethal tags in and demands ‘big, dumb’ Moose! He loudly informs Moose that he’s going to ‘show [him] how to wrestle’, but is made to look foolish as Moose batters him to the floor with the vertical leap dropkick. Kyle and ACH take to the ring next, pelting each other with forearm strikes. ACH hits dropkicks on all his opponents, although it takes three to get Moose off his feet. Lethal stops him hitting Air Jordan and plants him with a flapjack though. The champ looks at isolating ACH, perhaps to make an example of him in his hometown, and in doing so forms an unlikely makeshift alliance with Mr ROH. Even when on the same page they can barely tolerate each other of course, and things start to unravel when Jay has to break up a Strong pinning attempt. Their bickering allows ACH to tag Moose, who hits a Proto-Bomb on Lethal, followed by a Five Knuckle Shuffle (seriously). Discus Lariat floors the champ for 2. O’Reilly succeeds in using his kicks to take Moose off his feet, but gets tossed trying a tornado DDT. Guillotine choke applied only for Briscoe to break with an unprotected boot to the head. Day One Neckbreaker gets 2 on the reDRagon member. Kyle tries the Jawbreaker Lariat…only to be pulled to the floor by ACH. It leaves Roddy alone in the ring to give Briscoe a big superplex. Axe & Smash by Kyle! Game Breaker by Moose…who then counters the Lethal Injection with a dropkick to the neck. HITSTICK TAKES OUT REFEREE PAUL TURNER! ROPE RUN CROSSBODY COUNTERED WITH A LETHAL ACE CRUSHER! JAY DRILLER ON LETHAL! He has the champ pinned but the referee is KO’d and can’t count the pin! Todd Sinclair runs out…but only gets to a 2 when he does finally administer the count. APRON BACKBREAKER from Strong to Briscoe…only for him in turn to be wiped out by an O’Reilly diving knee strike. AIR JORDAN BY ACH! Midnight Star, but Lethal pulls O’Reilly out! LETHAL INJECTION on ACH! The champ wins the match at 16:43

Rating - *** - As with the Bucks/Deliri-Burger match I felt this was on the upper-end of a 3* rating, but just didn’t do quite enough to edge into 4* territory. The last six or seven minutes were outstanding, but it definitely felt like slow going early on. The highlights for me were Lethal’s schemes and dastardly strategies, which culminated in him profiting from ACH’s big dive spot to beat ACH himself, and the obvious tease on a Lethal/Briscoe rematch. Of course Lethal has to survive Colt Cabana, but if he does so setting up the Briscoe rematch is a wise move. Jay Briscoe was almost in tears that there was no referee to count his pin on Lethal…

Jay Lethal gets on the microphone to go on another rant about having nobody left to beat. Jay Briscoe interrupts to point out that he just had the champ beaten…and that he has never received a rematch for the World Title. At the very mention of having to face Briscoe again Lethal legit walks out. Things definitely aren’t over between those two!

SIDENOTE – This DVD has a brilliant promo from Jay Briscoe as a bonus feature. Brilliant in the sense that, the second he is reinserted into the World Title picture he starts demonstrating the same wild, crazy, obsessive tendencies which saw him create a ‘Real World Title’ and almost lose his mind when he was last in the championship scene. I love that continuity…

BJ Whitmer vs Adam Page – Street Fight
This is the 14th Anniversary Show rematch that Adam Page has been petitioning for. He spent two years in The Decade, carrying BJ’s bags, conducting ‘young boy’ duties and believing that The Decade were looking out for his best interests. But slowly he realised (just as Roderick Strong and Jimmy Jacobs did before him) that Whitmer was only motivated by selfish goals. The culmination of that came when BJ’s ongoing issues with Steve Corino cost Page a win in his big televised grudge match over Jay Briscoe. From then it was just a matter of time before Adam finally snapped and walked away. BJ beat his former protégé at the 14th Anniversary, but only by cheating. Although Page may think a no-rules rematch is in his favour, he’d do well to remember that Whitmer is a veteran who has survived The Prophecy’s battles with the Second City Saints, ludicrous bumps from the top rope into the crowd with Jimmy Jacobs, plus ROH’s wars with both CZW and SCUM. He survived some of the most violent matches in Ring Of Honor history – like Cage Of Death, Steel Cage Warfare, a Barbed Wire Match and MULTIPLE Street Fights. This environment will hold no fears for him.

Both men are in street clothes for this. Whitmer spits in Page’s face for refusing his jerk handshake and the fight is underway. Page looks wide-eyed and crazy as he uses a fan’s walking stick to choke BJ against the guardrails. Apparently it’s a fans bring the weapons match, since next he takes a whiteboard sign from another front row fan and bludgeons his former partner with that as well. Shooting Star torpedo headbutt levels Whitmer as well. BJ looks bedraggled…but has been in so many matches like this and doesn’t panic, even when Adam starts braining him against steel chairs in the corner. A dragon suplex follows, with Mr Wrestling supposing that Page is attacking the dodgy neck of the veteran. MANDIBLE CLAW WITH STREAMERS! The fans had been chanting for him to use the streamers for minutes, so they go nuts for that spot. However, appeasing the fans is the window of opportunity BJ as been waiting for. He pounces with ROLLING GUARDRAIL BACKBREAKERS! He refuses to stop, with fans even extending their arms to try and save Page from as much of the impact as possible. Page’s back is covered in some really nasty bruises after that. NECK DROP GERMAN SUPLEX by Whitmer gets 2. In just a few moves BJ has left Adam’s back and neck in as messed up a state as his own…and he isn’t finished. He removes his belt and starts whipping his former young boy. Next he tries to dump Page into the crowd, but doesn’t count on Page hopping up with the BUCKSHOT LARIAT OVER THE RAILING! Belt shots to Whitmer’s neck and back now, until Page’s Spike DDT drops BJ on his head again. But Whitmer counters by dumping his opponent on his sore back with the high velocity powerslam for 2. SPIKE DDT THROUGH AN OPEN CHAIR…GETS 2! How much more can Whitmer’s beaten up old neck take? Page looks to polish him off with a table, but again Whitmer shows his experience in this environment. He watches as it takes Page forever to get it into the ring then jumps him as soon as he does so. BACK SUPERPLEX does still more damage to that back. More Street Fight veteran strategising comes next as BJ sets up the time-keeping table rather than wasting time opening up a folded table from under the ring. He pulls Adam up the ropes to the top, and soon they are both teetering over it. ‘Please don’t die’ – San Antonio. PAGE WITH A MOUSTACHE RIDE INTO THE RING! That might be one big move on the neck too many, as Whitmer doesn’t move and Todd Sinclair extensively checks on him. PAGE SPEARS HIM THROUGH A TABLE ANYWAY! Page wins at 19:14

Rating - **** - I haven’t seen much in the way of praise for this one, but I thought it was f*cking great. It was a little old-fashioned as they shunned lots of elaborate weaponry and high risk bumps in favour of aggressive and violent story-telling (and the fans got a little distracting with their incessant cat-calls for the wrestlers to use various ringside artefacts) but I really liked the story they told. Page hates BJ, so it made perfect sense that his strategy was to go after his notoriously bad neck like a motherf*cker. And I loved that Whitmer, who has been in matches like this so many times before, KNEW what was coming and found so many veteran ways to come back. He beat the sh*t out of Page’s back and neck (covering Page’s body in horrendous bruising) in an effort to make his former student as broken down as he is…but it just didn’t work. Page teased a Jacobs/Whitmer-style superbomb to the floor, but instead produced something even more damaging (and incredible foreshadowing of his ‘Being The Elite’ rivalry with Joey Ryan in the years to come); the super swinging neckbreaker. BJ was done after that (and reportedly suffered a legitimately serious concussion). Great match, another superb performance from Adam Page. I am BEGGING Ring Of Honor to get serious and give him some kind of push up the card after this…

Tape Rating - *** - VERY low-end of a 3* rating on this show. It was very much B-show stuff for the most part…but I genuinely believe that for Ring Of Honor fans who watch every show there was a lot to enjoy here. Even Silas/Mark at the start of the night – which I only gave 2* to – wasn’t a bad match by any means. Rhett Titus and Will Ferrara defied my low expectations to produce a really fun little bout. Bobby Fish and Kenny King were killing it until their match ended way too quickly. The Pretty Boy Killers looked awesome. The teasing of a future Lethal/Briscoe World Title rematch is major news coming out of the Proving Ground Six Man Mayhem. The Bucks vs Delirious/Cheeseburger bout was comedic gold. And finally, the main event was really damn good (even though I can’t find many who have liked it as much as I did). It’s definitely the weakest ROH live event of 2016 thus far, but I’d still put this ahead of multiple shows from 2014/15 for sure. 

Top 3 Matches
3) Jay Lethal vs ACH vs Roderick Strong vs Moose vs Kyle O’Reilly vs Jay Briscoe (***)
2) Young Bucks vs Delirious/Cheeseburger (***)
1) Adam Page vs BJ Whitmer (****)

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